Hush little baby (drug version)

Hush, little baby, don't say a word, Papa's gonna buy you a cannabis roll.

And if that roll don't give you a trip, Papa's gonna mix some hash in it.

And if that joint turns smoky before the hit, Papa's gonna buy you some crystal meth.

And if that glass gets broke before the time is up, Papa's gonna buy you some LSD.

And if that acid doesn't make your world go blue,Papa's gonna buy you a syringe and some black tar .

And if that tar won't blow your mind, Papa's gonna mix everything that was ever made.

And if the cocktail is yet not the bomb, Papa's gonna shoot you twice in the gut (if you are still alive).

The voice.

Your heart beat goes up and you don't understand why? It drives you crazy and your heart beat goes up further. WTF! Human mind gets really psyched up if it doesn't understand whats happening to the body it's responsible for controlling. Lose control. You try to recollect what happened. It was just a voice, directed at you. For a short duration thankfully as you couldn't have held on any longer. But there wasn't anything special to the voice nor the message it conveyed; it was very normal. But then it strikes you after hours of struggle to get back to reality: the normality was what rushed the blood into your head; your mind unconsciously hoping to turn the normalcy to something special. Something more than normal; extraordinary if you will, magical if you may.

For once you try to be honest about it to yourself: you were waiting for that moment. Planning for hours on how to face those few seconds. How to face that voice. You had a good plan but alas it didn't go well. Because you forgot, and you learnt it the hard way, that that voice blows your mind away. You are so spellbound that your mind now tries to breakaway. You lose concentration, purpose and reason. Your plan is failing miserably and then you commit a stupid mistake. You try to stick to the plan. The plan, my dear readers, is a trick your mind plays on you to convince you that you are in control. Lost control.

You are someone who learns from mistakes. You don't blame your surroundings on your failure, you blame yourself. You rectify. And my dear readers , this is what I learnt: The plan is to lose. Lose yourself in that voice which you so much adored for no reason. Don't find a purpose;there isn't one. Losing is gaining control.

30 day song challenge ?

WTF is the fuss with this thing anyway? And why_TF is it a "challenge" ? Do we get a prize for this? Whats the prize? Can I exchange it for something I like, if I dont like the aforementioned prize? Free Farmville points? Yipeee!!

Anyway, since most of the categories in 30 types are really random and overlapping, and since I am a big fan of only METAL and PROGRESSIVE ROCK ( none of which makes me feel guilty or makes me wanna dance to), I will post some songs without any tags here:

PS: Before you close this page expecting some howlish shouting collision of distortion, let me tell you this: distortion is not metal, the tune is.Personally I dont like too much distorted guitars. Many metal songs are bad but the ones that are good will surely blow your mind away with their awesome energy and epic-ness.

Opeth - Black Rose Immortal; 20 minutes of pure epicness especially the second half. And if you just want a glimpse of what metal is : listen from 12:00 to 15:00.



Agalloch - Limbs; the vocals are just glorious. this song gets me energized every time I hear it.



Pink Floyd - High Hipes; a song so beautiful, it brings tears to my eyes.



Black Sabbath - Black Sabbath; really this song makes me forget all the superficiality of the world and makes me reach inside to what I really am :p



Porcupine Tree - Arriving Somewhere But Not Here; Defines progressive awesomeoness. Listen from 5:00. Period.

Where art thou, good friend?

Damn I don't have good friends. The people I like living with - the "cool", carefree and fun loving people but who are NOT unreliable, irresponsible and idiots- are the rarest species on the face of the Universe. By experience, I can say in fair confidence that there are 4 dimensions to a person's personality: one is the ultra vague "cool"ness, the second is , another loose term here, "muggu"ness, the third is responsibility and the final is "arbit"ness, which means showing out of the ordinary kind of behaviour from the usual. The first two are obviously independent complete spaces, the third is an unprecisely defined space but shown to resemble a non-invariant linear combination of first two and the final is some arbit transformation of the first three spaces.

Enough technical jargon and definitions let's get on to the first line of this post. Well, in my life here in IIT I have lived with lots of different people. All my friends. But here is what I go through typically with different classes of people:

CLASS A or alpha or peace putters - They are the most sought out class. But to be actually here you need to leap a really arbit curve from the second and third dimension so its really painful,morally, to come to this dimension. You can't just come here for some arbitrary period of time and leave. You must carry a certain threshold measure to be actually here.More of this class can only be explained using quantum computation so I will not go into that.

CLASS B or beta or muggus or tam brahms(:p) - They derive most of their attributes from gamma class, and hence have a (hidden) muggu nature where they want to put 10 pointers in every course of every department because learning, as they are told, is their job.

CLASS C or gamma or wannabe cores - These are the responsible people who take pain and sweat to get things done. They are generally liked since they care for social welfare and other such garbage but also hoped to loosen up a little bit. This is the simplest dimension to get in and get out(ask saarang coords) but to stay in takes courage and determination.

Class D or delta or arbit - This is the class jfka7k kj984 . Studies trying to explain such behaviour have kjdf989 343d%^% because the people FASD6767&^&^. The true meaning of life is supposed to be scattered in pieces all over this dimension but requires all the pieces and then a 1024bit cracker to decipher it. Actually this is because djfakljdf989$%$ which is why ff gfg6767676234223456780 948.


So you are pissed at me because I gave you another round of heavy technical education. I am sorry but here we are finally. I have been totally pissed because my close friends are never a healthy mix of all these 4 classes. They are either heavily of A: which ends up me getting infinitely pained , or B: which makes me bored to death. Well I didnt expect to write this much( actually I was not gonna write the first 2 paras and only write this para but I guess I am in 4th dimension now) so I am not gonna explain any situations that might have motivated this blog post but I am sure feeling relieved now.

Gen Thoughts of 4th semester

I wake up remembering what it was. Ever experienced the trance state where you are sure you are awake but you have no control over your thoughts.The thoughts which only get aggrevated more as you try to stop them from flooding your mind system. These things , insanely random, but always containing characters and places that you know. The characters that are oblivious to their own self and are controlled, so subtly, only by your mind. Doing things without objection, without a bit of reluctance, without a doubt, even if its beyond the periphery of their own physical or even mental territory but not of yours. This ephemeral state which seems to flow for hours usually happens on a saturday morning after a long night before.

Enough pondering. Now taking idea from another blog I am gonna write whatever stuff comes into my head for the next 5 minutes or so.
BEGIN.

Girls. I live in an institute where talking about girls is like talking about drugs or even taking them. I am almost crossing over the teens and its only obvious that the curiosity of being in love has become really really high.Hence I try really hard. I am not ashamed to say this but I claim that there is atleast one girl in your every class that you are attracted to. Who you would want to talk with more. If you get the chance or had the guts for. But being one of the few forward thinkers in this traditional place I am not really assured or even given a good estimate of what the feedback will be like. And hence its safe to assume that the feedback will be O(smile). HUH? Thats big Oh notation. I think that the simple human emotion of gently smiling while talking to new people itself is like a crime here. If you smile , you become "despo". Oh yeah, well what are you? A fking hypocrite.

Okay I am bored. Lets talk about my day. Full of shit. Classes aint worth dime. Okay I am not the brightest of students but atleast I understand things when they are conveyed clearly , intuitively and most importantly in a friendly interactive way. The professor's might be stud n all but clearly there are only few who work for the overall development of the student. The one's who catch proxy and lament at sleeping students etc just dont get it that a classroom is for someone who wants to learn. And it isnt necessary to learn everything in life. Especially academically. Unless your whole life aim is to excel academically. Working hard is important but so is putting peace and making close friends which you wont be able to do once you have got a job or something. This para is so not for freshies aiming for BC. So lets move on.

How (What) you doing? (Joey style) This summer? Me? I tried for two summer schools - IMSc and IISc and I think I am rejected in first and still waiting for result in the second. I want to study something deeply and surely dont want to do some gen intern where my legs will be on the table and my mind somewhere way outside the room. Being a dual degree helped.

Okay, the mood for writing has depleted. And I am loggin off. This idea of writing whatever comes to my mind is pretty neat and I think I will be writing more posts based on this "pretty" soon.

Narcissism

The legend of Narcissus.

Soothsayers prophesied : Narcissus shall live to a ripe old age if he didn't come to know himself.

But the universe, always on the verge of increasing the entropy of itself, couldn't bear this notion, this permanency of thought of some old hags efficient at reading the language of the stars, or so they claim and we believe(d), perhaps.

Son of a goddess, the beauty of this young boy was unfathomable.Of which he didn't know. Which was good. Because the unfathomable cannot be fathomed. Atleast physically.

The work of the Destiny-writer or some random collisions of some infinite molecules led this boy to a pond. And again, through the same process, led this boy to peek into the still water. And what he saw changed his world.

The most beautiful person he had ever seen or imagined to see. And again the universe playing its own peevy games, it was love at first sight. For days the boy stared at his reflection. The reflection provided him everything food, water, and the most important of all, love. Again permanency. Again universe. Again randomness.

And in his love, he fell and drowned into the pond. Unfathomably. In a few days, the water of the pond metamorphosed into salty tears.

Why? The gods asked it.

The lake: I weep for Narcissus.

God: Ah yes. He was a beautiful boy.

The lake: I weep for Narcissus, but I never noticed that Narcissus was beautiful. I weep because, each time he knelt beside my banks, I could see, in the depths of his eyes, my own beauty reflected.

"What a lovely story", said the Alchemist and the Tab.

----

What do you infer, my readers, from the above composition? Do you find the writing style unique? Is it funny? Or is Narcissus stupid?

Well but what did Narcissus do? He realized himself. What is wrong with knowing about yourself? Isn't it the meaning of life? But doesn't it spoil the fun for the ubiquitous space called the Universe.

Think, my readers. Is it really necessary to ponder over things that you have got from yourself. Things that belong to you through an eternal bond. Things that are sufficient to define a world, self-sufficient in itself, obviously. For I, I have stopped defining my world. Because over the past few months, I have realized that being contained in your own world is what makes you blind. And fall. But having a world that encompasses the universe is what makes even the universe fall beneath your feet.

Excerpt from The Alchemist

/* Just for the sake of keeping this blog updated I am posting an excerpt from this great book called The Alchemist by Paul Coelho */

"Why do we have to listen to our hearts?" the boy asked, when they had made camp that day.

"Because wherever your heart is, that is where you'll find your treasure."

"But my heart is agitated," the boy said. "It has its dreams, it gets emotional, and it's become passionate over a woman of the desert.It asks things of me, and it keeps me from sleeping many nights, when I'm thinking about her."

"Well, that's good. Your heart is alive. Keep listening to what it has to say."

During the next three days, the two travelers passed by a number of armed tribesmen, and saw others on the horizon. The boy's heart began to speak of fear. It told him stories it had heard from the Soul of the World, stories of men who sought to find their treasure and never succeeded. Sometimes it frightened the boy with the idea that he might not find his treasure, or that he might die there in the desert. At other times, it told the boy that it was satisfied: it had found love and riches.

"My heart is a traitor," the boy said to the alchemist, when they paused to rest the horses. "It doesnt want me to go on."

"That makes sense," the alchemist answered. "Naturally it's afraid that, in pursuing your dream, you might lose everything you've won."

"Well, then, why should I listen to my heart?"

"Because you will never again be able to keep it quiet. Even if you pretend not to have heard what it tells you, it will always be there inside you, repeating to you what you're thinking about life and about the world."

"You mean I should listen, even if it's treasonous?"

"Treason is a blow that comes unexpectedly. If you know heart well, it will never be able to that to you. Because you'll know it dreams and wishes, and will know how to deal with them.

You will never be able to escape from your heart. So it's better to listen to what it has to say. That way, you'll never have to fear an unanticipated blow."

The boy continued to listen to his heart as they crossed the desert. He came to understand its dodges and tricks, and to accept it as it was. He lost his fear, and forgot about his need to go back to the oasis, because, one afternoon, his heart told him that it was happy. Even though I complain sometimes," it said, " it's because I'm the heart of a person, and people's hearts are that way. People are afraid to pursue their most important dreams, because they feel that they don't deserve them, or that they'll be unable to achieve them. We, their hearts, become fearful just thinking of loved ones who go away forever, or of moments that could have been found but weren't, or of treasures that might have been found but were forever hidden in the sands. Because, when these things happen, we suffer terribly."

"My heart is afraid that it will have to suffer," the boy told the alchemist one night as they looked up at the moonless sky.

"Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself. And that no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of its dreams, because every second of the search is a second's encounter with God and with eternity."

"Every second of the search is an encounter with God," the boy told his heart. "When I have been truly searching for my treasure, every day has been luminous, because I've known that every hour was a part of the dream taht I would find it. When I have been truly searching for my treasure, I've discovered things along the way that I never would have seen had I not had the courage to try things that seemed impossible for a shepherd to achieve."

So his heart was quiet for an entire afternoon. That night, the boy slept deeply, .....................................

/* For those who haven't read this book already: Don't read it if you are seeking literary pleasure but if you want to look back at life and understand the avoidable mistakes that you might have committed or the mistakes that are on its way to being committed. */

PS: I got a drum set in my house now BWAHAHAHAHA. \m/.