22/03

Arrgh! Havent had a good laugh in so many days.Probably it really is Quiz week and not some figment of my self-injurious imagination as it always seems to be.Well anyway, lets begin.

Workshop; As usual as usual[:)] I havent even taken my job(workpiece) 40 minutes into the class whereas all my group mates have meticulously and belligerently chosen the job to which they belonged fulfilling the hitherto unfulfilled prophecy of the iron era. PS: I was 20 minutes late to class and wasted 15 minutes extra in talking to the workshop in-charge.

Me(face glowing red by the exuberant heat produced by the turning of the shovel held by the great Devesh): Dude , you must be the one who invented the fire.

Me(to the great Vamshi recognizing his great skills in using the tongs): Dude, you must be the one who invented the hands.

Me(to the great Shankar staring in awe as he hammered all our jobs to near perfection) : Dude, I think you have taken the HammerFall concert a bit too seriously. Pun intended.

Me(to Vaibhav who is busy finding his job in the fire and already witness to the aforementioned dialogues): Now, what are you good at?

Vaibhav: I am a fucking mediocre.


MA1020; we all are filling our free elective forms for next semester maths course.

Barath(freaking his ass off on what course to choose even after making a scene for 20 mins, which includes asking the prof twice and almost everyone in the class): Macha, I can never make decisions da.
Me(nonchalantly): Oh yeah lets see, will you become gay if the situation arises?
Barath(after 10 full seconds): No.
Me: Then you can make decisions.
Barath: Macha, if its something like will you save your life from getting killed...
Me: Being gay wont kill you.
Barath: Ya it will.
Srivatsan: Then its an ill informed decision.

12/03

Check this out:



Physics Lab, 9-12; as usual I have no enthu to even mark a point on the graph and hence I resort to singing.

WARNING: The following will not be least bit funny if you dont appreciate plain vanilla slapstick dumb perverted comedy.I do. For those who didnt laugh at Jon Lajoie's songs (Show Me Your Genitals, in this case), you can safely block me from all online connections you may have with me because the following may hurt really bad.

Me(to Santosh): Show me your GENITALIA...O sorry, I meant readings.
Me(to Nihit) : Show me your GENITALIA...O sorry, I meant pencil.
Me(to Shailend):Show me your GENITALIA...O sorry, I meant scale.
Me(to ...): Show.............
..
.

And so it went for atleast 2 hours. Irritating Shailend so much he abused me. Yeah, he abused me. Why make a big deal out of it? Well this is what he said- Wonode sunni in pig's chut. That sentence used 4 odd languages. Can you translate the words?

10/03

CRC201, MA1020; sitting in the last bench is Srivatsan, and Me and Barath in front of him.

/*Everyone bored out of their mind except Barath (who is busy converting something to something polar) */
Srivatsan (to Barath): Macha, if you do this problem I will win 200k..no, sorry ,2k. I will give you 20% da.
Barath ( to everyone in the immediate surrounding) : Wtf put 50%. That is the C2D rule.
Srivatsan : What? I have already solved some 10 problems. Okay, no, 5 problems. This is the 6th and last problem.
Barath : Okay, then 1/6th
Me(who everyone thought was actually paying attention): Dude 20% was a better deal.
Barath (almost peeing in his pants)(to Srivatsan): Dude I will go with the old 20% deal.
Barath(intended to me but heard by everyone in intermediate surrounding): That is why I need a math advisor like you in such situations. In fact, why dont you solve the problem.I will give you the 2% that you just saved me.


Tapti, around 9; ice cream night in progress.


/* Hogging hazaar ice cream */
Guda: Macha I am sure this(ice cream brick) costs more than that da.
Sreshan (to Guda): Macha you are saying as if you own Amul da.
Me (to Guda): Macha you are saying as if you milked their cows da.
Sreshan ( to Guda): Macha you are saying as if you were the cow da.
Guda ( to me): Macha you fucked the cow da.
Me ( to everyone) : All your children will be studs da.


INTRO:

Hello world.This is Me.I will publish everything I think is worth publishing from my experiences of each day. Mostly it will be some situational comedy put by Me, my painful friends or the complete opposite by my prof. I will try to reproduce these instances as accurately as possible, which includes actual scene setting, tone of conversation, language, words, tangible expressions et cetera. Feel free to comment because there is a delete button for that too.